Worth It
by GossipGirlHere
Summary: Susan is about to leave Narnia forever, but can Caspian bear to leave her behind?


**PLEASE READ THE AUTHORS NOTE!!!**

**A/N: Hey!!! Let me just explain that I do NOT own the Chronicles of Narnia. Anyway, I change POV a lot in this story. 1st it's Susan, then Caspian, then Peter, then Susan, then Caspian, then Peter. This is really fluffy so don't look for practicality. On the subject of reviews: I LOVE getting them. I like getting both encouragement and constructive criticism like "your grammar was not the best" or "the POV switching was confusing" but I do NOT like when people say really mean things like "it was DISGUSTING!!! I HATED it!!! There was no point and it makes no sence!!!". Those comments don't help me become a better writer, and they are just plain mean. If you can't say somthing helpful, constructive, or encouraging, don't say anything at all. THANKS!!!  
**

I walked towards the doorway, and away from my last chance to stay with him. I fought back tears. I knew that this was the right thing to do, for him and for me. He needed to stay and be king, and I needed to stay with my family, and my family needed to go home. I knew that I could never go back, and even if I did, he would be dead, time moved so quickly in Narnia. I glanced at Peter who had a sad look in his eyes. Our eyes met, and I could tell that he knew what was happening in my head, and that he was sorry about it. I took one last look before I went through the doorway, and our eyes met. Looking at him made it impossible not to have tears escape my eyes.

When we appeared on the other side or the doorway, back at the railway station, it took all of my self control not to break down. I was wearing my uniform again, and so were the others, but that was all I noticed before the tears were too thick for me to see through. Lucy and Edmund were talking happily, but I didn't bother to listen.

* * *

She turned away from me and walked towards the doorway. I couldn't take it; I was going to break down. I knew that we were doing the right thing, because I needed to stay here and be king, and she needed to stay with her family. That was one of the many amazing things about her, her unyielding loyalty to those she loved. But, how could I stay here and be king when my heart was leaving with her? She turned back to look at me with tears in her eyes. I could barely contain tears now as she turned away, ready to walk out of my life forever. I had seconds to make my decision. I looked at Aslan, hoping for a sign, some clue as to whether I should follow my heart or my head. Aslan nodded, and that was all I needed. I stepped through the doorway, just as it was about to disappear.

I immerged in a crowded place that I had no name for. I was wearing kaki pants and a white button-down shirt, not the splendid robes I had been wearing. I could see a train, something the professor had taught me about, and just in front of it I saw Peter. I ran towards them, pushing through the crowd. I could see Peter, then Edmund, then Lucy, but where was Susan? I ran as fast as I could, and was right behind them. Then I saw her, they were entering the train, Edmund and Lucy talking and laughing, Peter looking concernedly over at Susan, who was staring at the floor tears still in her eyes, though some had escaped and were cascading down her cheeks. She looked more beautiful than I could say. Her hair fell in curls just passed her shoulders, and her blue eyes were sparkling, even though they were full of tears.

I raced to the train and made it just before the doors closed, though I was separated from them still by a group of boys. I edged through the crowed towards her, not really noticing who I bumped. I barely registered when Peter looked up, or when Lucy and Edmund broke off. What I did register was Susan, my Susan, down at the floor, tears cascading down her cheeks.

I put a finger under her chin, and she looked up. Shock flitted across her face before it was replaced by a fierce joy similar to my own. Without conscious thought I kissed her, not worrying about the crowd that was probably watching.

* * *

I could see then more clearly than I had ever seen what was really going on. All this time I thought she was mad at me, and that that was why she was siding with him. In the last few days I had started to figure it out. When she had almost fallen off that cliff, and he looked so worried, when we met around the palace. But, now, looking at them standing there, I can tell that she loves him, and that he loves her. As she kissed him I felt truly awful. She wasn't ever going to see him again and it was my fault. I was the one that said that we would go back; I was the one that was tearing them apart. Now that I'd said it there was no turning back, because Susan would do what she thought was best for the family, regardless of what she wanted.

"What are they _doing_?" asked Lucy, looking slightly nauseated.

"You'll understand when you're older," I said with a faint smile.

They broke apart and hugged tightly, and I felt, if possible, even guiltier. I had just made my sister loose something irreplaceable, her heart, and I couldn't fix it.

"You're _sure_ when I'm older I'll understand?" asked Lucy, looking at them hugging with confusion written all over her face.

I nodded as Edmund said, "I'm older and don't think I _want _to understand," I couldn't help but chuckle. No, of course they didn't understand, but I did. The thought sobered me up at once.

Susan turned back to us and I could see tears brimming in her eyes. It made me want to weep for her. Our eyes connect, and I knew that she knew that I was sorry, but I also knew from that look that she wasn't changing her mind. I looked over at Caspian, who was looking at her. He had a look that no one could ever imitate or explain. He looked so lost, a look of longing was on his face, and his eyes never left Susan. Now I knew what agony, true agony, looked like.

I went through the door and found myself back at the railway station; it was like we'd never left. As we headed towards the train I could hear Edmund and Lucy talking, but I wasn't really listening. I was looking at Susan, who had her eyes to the floor. She was letting some tears escape her eyes, which showed me just how much pain she was in. She never cried, never. She never wanted to appear weak, because she was strong, and didn't like being comforted or taken care of.

We got on the train, and I was so preoccupied that at first I didn't notice him. Then, I saw him, but he wasn't looking at me, he was looking at her, as I knew he would be. I nudged Edmund, who, seeing Caspian, and putting two and two together for once in his life, nudged Lucy, who was not as fortunate as Edmund in figuring things out. She looked at me, prepared to ask a question, but I put a finger to my lips and jerked my head in the direction of Susan, who was still determinedly looking at the floor, tears sliding down her face.

Edmund, who had grabbed Lucy's hand, tapped me and gestured towards the other side of the train, trying to communicate without words that this was a private moment that he had no intention of watching. I nodded and we shepherded a confused Lucy to the other side of the train.

After about five minutes I couldn't take it anymore, and regardless, our stop was coming up soon. We made our way back to the other side of the train, to find Susan and Caspian, sitting next to each other on some seats that had apparently been vacated by their previous occupants, talking quietly, hands clasped.

* * *

I was looking at the floor, trying not to collapse into sobs. I barely noticed when Edmund and Lucy stopped talking, I hadn't been listening close enough to begin with. I felt a gentle hand under my chin, and looked up, expecting to see Peter, telling me something useless along the lines of 'it was for the best.' Of course I knew it was for the best, or I wouldn't have done it. I didn't need him feeling sorry for me. I knew that was a lie though. I knew in a matter of hours I would completely break down, hopefully we would make it back to our house by then, and I would need Peter. I would need the one person who actually understood what was happening inside my head. I would need the shoulder to cry on. But I couldn't stand to look into his eyes and see the pity there. I looked up and it was with shock that I registered that it was not Peter looking at me, it was Caspian. For a moment I thought I was hallucinating. But I could still feel his hand on my chin, and I knew it was him. I felt happier than I had ever felt in my life.

He kissed me, and I kissed back, and I was in heaven. I didn't care that an entire crowd of people, including my brothers and sister, was there, all I cared about was him. He had cared enough to do what I could not. He had cared enough to leave his people, his life, and his world just to be with me forever.

We broke apart and settled onto the nearest open seats, which had just been vacated by two elderly women who had just gotten off at the last stop.

A thousand questions were whizzing around in my head. The first one that bubbled to my lips was also the one I was the most worried about, "Are you sure?" I knew that he knew what I meant.

He grasped my hand and said, "Susan, I realized about a second after you left that there was no point in staying when my reason for living had left."

* * *

Her eyes teared up as I said this, and she leaned in to kiss me.

"But," she said, looking at me, "I'm not even worth it. You're smart, and talented, funny, and handsome, you were born a prince! And what am I? I'm some little British girl who likes to play princess."

I felt angry. Not at her, oh God not at her, but at me. How could I have let her think that for this long?

"Susan. You're the smartest, prettiest, funniest, most talented, amazing person I know. I was born a prince, but you _made _yourself a queen. Of course you're worth it! How could you think that you aren't?"

Her tears had stopped and she leaned in to kiss me but was stopped by Peter saying, "Guys, we have to get off at the next stop."

* * *

I couldn't help but beam. Susan was happy, it was written all over her face. The tears had stopped, her eyes sparkled, and her smile could only be matched in size and intensity by Caspian's.

"Okay," she said, taking his hand and leading him towards the doors, attracting many jealous looks from both girls and boys. What could I say? My sister was pretty, and as much as I hated to admit it, Caspian was handsome. I knew we had our differences, but I actually liked the guy. I also knew that it would take a lot of adjustment, but that it would be totally worth it.

By now we were walking on the sidewalk towards our house. I was at the back, with Edmund and Lucy directly ahead of me. Edmund was trying and failing to explain what was happening to Lucy, who was far too young to get it. They were whispering, but I doubt it would have made a difference if they'd shouted. Susan and Caspian were in their own little world, just looking at each other. I knew right then and there that it had all been worth it.


End file.
